One-way Passage

his swords and quietly closed his mouth, then made the decision for him. 

Tomb Sweeping Day[1] had long passed.
In the afternoon, the cemetery was deserted; there was barely a soul in sight.

The car stopped in the parking lot.
Xia Wennan stepped out in a haze, with no idea where to go.

Ming Luchuan locked the car and started walking towards the entrance of the cemetery.
Xia Wennan trailed after him in a disoriented state, like a lost child who couldn’t find their way home. 

He followed Ming Luchuan all the way to the entrance of a store and saw him pick up a large bouquet of flowers, which was when he realised that Ming Luchuan had come to buy flowers for his grandpa. 

The bouquet consisted of an abundant array of white and yellow flowers.
Ming Luchuan thrust it into Xia Wennan’s arms and addressed the shop owner to ask about the price. 

Xia Wennan stood aside with the flowers as Ming Luchuan paid for them, then said, “Thank you.”

Ming Luchuan said nothing, turning around to make his way out.

Xia Wennan could only resume following him. 

It was apparent that this wasn’t Ming Luchuan’s first visit.
He stepped onto a small uphill path with the ease of familiarity, his black leather shoes clattering as they came into contact with the stone steps.

As Xia Wennan descended the flight of steps, he inquired, “You’ve been here before?”

Ming Luchuan’s reply was detached and succinct: “Mm.”

“What did you come here for? Have you ever met my grandpa?” Xia Wennan asked.

“I have.”

Xia Wennan paused briefly before deciding to trudge on, “What for?”

“You proposed to me.
Don’t I need to go see your family?”

Inwardly, Xia Wennan vehemently denied that he’d ever propose to Ming Luchuan.
Because the man’s words on the subject were untrustworthy, he lost all desire to pursue it.

And very quickly, as he stood in front of the tombstone, his mood to ask questions waned.  

The name and photograph on the tombstone were undoubtedly his grandpa’s.
He wasn’t alone though, as it was a joint tombstone.
Apart from the ashes of the grandpa who’d raised him, the grave contained anothers—the Beta grandpa he’d never got to meet. 

His grandpa was an Omega.
Back then, his family had set up an arranged marriage for him, and his fiance was an Alpha.
And yet he’d ended up falling in love with a young Beta man, with whom he eloped after fleeing his arrangement.  

“Back in my day, things were different.
How could an Omega possibly marry a Beta? We had to stick to Alphas and Alphas only.” Xia Wennan’s grandpa used to say this to him all the time, always sounding faintly proud of himself. 

It was as though that smidgeon of pride washed away all his woes.
Despite the fact that his Beta husband died young and his only son and daughter-in-law were killed in a car accident, he still had a clever grandson.
Even though his life had been battered with hardships, he’d never once regretted it—because it was a life borne out of his own choices.
He was a fearless and incredible Omega.  

In front of the tombstone, Xia Wennan’s knees buckled as if they could no longer support his body.
He didn’t embrace the tombstone and cry then and there, instead lowering his head till no one could see his silent flowing tears.

When he went home to celebrate the Chinese New Year with his grandfather in his second year of university, he vowed to take his grandfather on a trip when he graduated, but he had no idea if he’d followed through on that promise.
All their lives, they’d only had each other, relied on each other; his grandpa hadn’t even gotten to live a comfortable life yet, and now he was already gone. 

There were two black-and-white photos on the tombstone: Xia Wennan’s Beta grandpa, an upright youth with thick brows and big eyes, remaining forever young, and his Omega grandpa, with white hair and fine wrinkles on his temple and the corner of his eyes.
His eyes were gentle and kind, with no trace of sadness or bitterness in them.
Perhaps he had known that someone was waiting for him and that they would always be able to reunite someday.

The two photographs were placed side by side, in sickness and in health. 

Xia Wennan lightly pressed his forehead against the cold tombstone and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

☆ ☆ ☆

[1] Tomb Sweeping Day, or if you’re familiar with the term: Qingming Festival.
It’s when Chinese people traditionally visit ancestral tombs to sweep them, so… pretty self-explanatory.