Life, Once Again!

and her emotions dry as well.

Maru felt as though his soul was plucked out of his body and dumped into a space of darkness without a speck of light.
He felt like the floor beneath him was going to collapse at any moment.
The ego that had climbed up to his throat screamed at him to hold her.
Maru killed that ego using whatever methods possible.

Just like how she wanted to know the reason for their breakup, Maru wished for her to not be curious about anything.
He wished for her to detest him just as much as she wanted the reason for their breakup to be clear.
He wished for her to slap him on the cheek, for her to insult him outright, or pour water over him like drama clichés.

She just left after saying goodbye.
Maru prayed.
He prayed that she would hold him in contempt; that she would despise him; and going forward, treat him as though he was nothing much.

Heewon and Haewon returned to the room.
The two asked where Gaeul went in confusion.
She left first – he explained simply.

“I’ll go get a breather.”

It was hot outside the restaurant.
He only realized that it was the middle of summer after leaving the restaurant.
His body suddenly swayed and his sense of direction disappeared.
He sat on the bench in front of the restaurant.
The conversations of the passersby felt like the buzzing of a hive of bees.
It was a sound that messed up his head.
He blocked his ears and curled up.
He felt separated from the rest of the world.
What was he supposed to live for in a situation where even hope disappeared from Pandora’s box?

Her life would no longer contain Han Maru anywhere.
Maru had never pictured such a scene.
He might have yielded the place of the lover, but he had never thought about a life without her.

So I’m such a weak person – Maru calmed his breathing.
It was the worst choice, and yet it was the best choice as well.
This was the only method he could choose in order to end this cycle of reincarnation.
As this cycle always ended with him marrying her, things would definitely be different this time.
If this didn’t change anything, he was planning to become the serial killer of the century in his next life.
Perhaps he would fall into hell if he did.

The suffocating breathing became smooth again.
His mind had half-died, but his body was desiring life.
In the end, people just kept living on like this: by compromising and despairing.
He could already picture himself locking himself up in his room once he heard about her wedding in the future, but what could he do? He was alive and had to keep living on.

Just as he was about to raise his gaze, a white trainer entered his eyes.
The thin ankle, as well as the well-shaped calf, allowed him to tell who they belonged to without raising his head.
Maru froze up and stayed still.
He didn’t have the courage to look up.
In the end, the woman in front of him crouched down.
He made eye contact with her.
Maru hurriedly looked down.

“You said you didn’t have a reason, so why are you putting on such an expression?”

“I don’t know.”

“You said you had nothing to say to me, so why are you so agonized?”

“Well, I don’t really know either.”

“Look at me in the eyes when you say that.”

“I don’t have anything to tell you even if I do look.”

A pair of cold hands touched his two cheeks.
Maru was forced to lift his head.
Han Gaeul, drenched in sweat, was in front of him.

“I ran a lap around the area because I felt so upset.
I just couldn’t understand.
I tried to understand why you did that.
But I still don’t understand.
I thought that I was very well aware of the man known as Han Maru, but I must have been wrong.
I don’t know anything, absolutely nothing.”

Her eyes sucked in everything.
Maru tried to turn his head away because he felt like she could draw out the true feelings that he had locked up deep inside his heart.
However, Gaeul’s hands were strong.
Indeed, she was strong before she became the mother of a child.
She was a woman who propped him up from behind whenever he was about to collapse.

“Let me ask you just one thing.
Do you like me? Or hate me?”

Maru was unable to reply.
He felt as though he would confess his deep love if he spoke right now, which would put the word ‘like’ to shame.

“Alright, you’re planning on staying silent until the end, huh? Do you remember what you told me before? ‘It doesn’t matter even if you meet another man.
I will make you love me again’.”

She recited his words in a meaningful way.

“I actually lied.
I went to your last performance.
I saw you on stage as well.
I was planning on saying hello, but I just left.
Do you know why? It was because you felt so close to me.
It felt like breaking up was nothing.
You dumped me, but if I keep liking you, it would hurt my pride, wouldn’t it? No, this is a lie too.
I was afraid that you might not like me.
I was scared of confirming that I held no meaning to you.
Let me ask you again.
Do you love me?”

“Don’t do this.
Everything’s over between us.”

“Answer my question.
Do you love me or not?”

“I don’t.
I don’t like you.
Done now?”

“Yes, I’m done now.”

Gaeul stood up.
Was she going to leave now? He raised his head slowly.
He could see Gaeul’s face faintly smiling.

“I found out for the first time today that there are times you can’t lie.”

Gaeul kissed her palm.
Then, she put her palm against Maru’s forehead.

“Look forward to it.
I will make you say that you like me with your lips again.
Phew, that makes me feel refreshed.
I’m going now.
I’m leaving for real, okay?”

“Han Gaeul.”

He tried calling out to her, but she walked away without looking back.
Maru raised his hand and caressed his forehead.
A faint red substance rubbed off his forehead.

It was a night that was mixed with despair and glee.
It was a hot night.

If you find any errors ( broken links, non-standard content, etc..
), Please let us know so we can fix it as soon as possible.

Tip: You can use left, right, A and D keyboard keys to browse between chapters.