I Don’t Even Know Who the Child’s Father Is

th his arms slightly raised.
I breathed a huge sigh of relief and handed the baby to him.
Thereafter, he started cooing at the baby in a disgustingly sweet voice, “How can you be so pretty? You get prettier every day.”

As much as I do not want to interrupt this grandfather-granddaughter moment, I needed to know why I was summoned, “Why did you call for me?”

The King suddenly looked at me with serious eyes, and said, “You know, I can’t keep referring to my grandchild like this.
I keep calling her ‘you’.
You’ve got to give her a name.” 

Honestly, I couldn’t give her a name because it didn’t feel right.
I couldn’t just callously decide on it, since it was something the real Etricia should do.
If I do it in her stead, it would feel as though I am taking that privilege from her.

I know I had doubts that I will be able to get back to my world, but I still haven’t completely given up hope that one day I will.
Therefore, I have been delaying naming the child all this time.

“How about…Rustina?” The King suggested and I gave him a confused look.

“…Why Rustina?”

“Because it is a combination of Angel and Gratia (love).”

So… Angel love?

I began to wonder if that really was a good name for her?

Judging by the kid’s fair white skin and blonde hair that looked like golden threads spun by angels themselves, then I guess she does look like she came down from heaven. 

It’s not a bad name.

As if she was voicing her approval the baby started to mumble, “Baaahhh…”

“You seem to like it.” Rustina grinned at my father’s words.
Seeing my father and child interact together was actually pretty cool. 

Still, even though Rustina always placated the King’s temper towards Etricia, I knew that I needed to work hard myself and earn his good graces.

I cleared my throat and asked apprehensively, “Are you angry with me? Because as soon as I stepped inside you started glaring at me.”

My father gave me a look of confusion that slowly faded into a contemplative look, “Hmm… that’s right, I am angry at you.
But you will understand how I feel if you were in my position.”

He spoke solemnly, but his hand did not stay still for a moment.
His gesticulations also became bigger with each passing second.
All the while Rustina giggled as she also moved with my father’s animated swaying.

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She looked delighted by his antics.

“Do you still not know who the child’s father is?” I asked.

“Hah! That’s exactly why I’m holding you here Etricia… they said there is a way to find out.”

“Really?”

This was the best news I have heard!

I did not dare hide my joy, and gleefully smiled. 

However, I noticed that Rustina’s smiling face contorted and her expression visibly darkened.
I wonder if she was about to cry? I looked at my daughter with anxious eyes, and just as I predicted, she burst into tears.

“Ugh, uwaaaaaah!”

“Don’t cry, peek-a-boo.
Look at your grandpa’s face, isn’t he handsome?” I told her as I began making faces and pointing at her to make her look at the King.
Seeing as it seemed like she wasn’t going to stop crying anytime soon, I went over to my father’s side and took her from him.

I began bouncing her lightly in my arms and asked the King, “…But, what does keeping me here have anything to do with finding Rustina’s dad?”

Rustina was still crying so badly that I tried to calm her down by patting her on the back, but to no avail.

“Why are you suddenly complaining about being confined in the palace? Is something the matter?”

I could sense the tension between me and my father building again.
Due to our unanswered question, we couldn’t help but feel frustrated with each other whenever we talk.
To clear the air between us I focused on running around the room and comforting the still crying child.

“So… what is the method you were talking about that will help us find out who Rustina’s father is?” Because Rustina was still heavily wailing, I figured that I needed to end this conversation soon and bring her back to my room.
Therefore, I needed to hear that information quickly.

On the other hand, I noticed that my father also looked equally impatient with me and walked over towards where I was standing.
He gave a quick glance at Rustina and told me, “That kid’s throat is going to hurt, she needs to stop crying before her vocal chords collapse.”

I gave him an exasperated look and replied, “Then please tell me quickly what it is because I am getting tired too.”

I really don’t understand why Rustina is acting this way.
I thought she calmed down a bit after we’ve been together all day.
I also made sure that she took her meals and changed her diapers so I really am perplexed as to why she’s behaving this erratically.

I turned my attention back to my father and tried to ignore Rustina’s discontented screams, “You said there was only one way, but that…”

“Uwaaaaaah!”

Before my father could answer, Rustina raised her voice even louder and wept.
Realizing that her crying was just going to grow worse, I decided to cut this conversation short, “Father, I’ll hear about that later.
I guess I’ll have to go to my room and comfort her first.”

Perhaps my child was getting sleepy, right?

So I hurriedly left the office and headed back to my room.

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As we got further from the King’s office I noticed that the tears on Rustina’s face tickled down until she completely stopped crying.
I looked down at her suspiciously while she stared back at me innocently; as if nothing had happened.

As I looked into Rustina’s eyes, I found myself smiling involuntarily. 

You really are a weird baby, aren’t you?

“Aren’t you curious about your father too? It would be better for you to have a father.” I told her. 

That’s right, she needed her real dad because I won’t be able to give her my heart completely.

I can’t love her…I can’t even figure out what she wants when she cries!

How can I be her mother if I’m like this?

“Ha…” A sigh escaped my lips.

Yes, what do I know? It’s a really strange situation.

“I will definitely find your dad.” I told her.

However, my words seemed to have only upset her more, “Ugh, ahhh.”

“Rustina?”

Didn’t she just react to the word ‘dad’? I tilted my head at her.
It is obvious to me now that she reacted violently against hearing that word.

But isn’t it crazy to think that babies will be able to do that, right?

I decided to test her once more and said out loud, “…Dad?”

She started hiccupping, “Eubb.”

“Rustina, your father?”

“Oh, boo boo! Uhhh.”

Oh no…She looks like she’s about to cry…

Okay one last time, I took a deep breath and spat out the words with the same intensity the King had earlier when he spoke to me, “I will definitely find your father…?”

“Uwaaaaah!”

Oh my gosh, is it possible? Do you not want us to look for your dad? 

I looked at Rustina who was in my arms with a look of disbelief.  As we were near my chambers, the maids started rushing out in the hallways as they heard her cries reverberating through the walls. 

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