Chapter 82: The Edge of Memory
What is this!?
I unconsciously fell to my knees and held my head with both hands.
The unusual deafening sound of the explosion was pounding in both my ears.
I couldn't hear anything around me.
The pain that felt like my eyeballs were going to be knocked back into their sockets and squeezing my brain.
My vision turns a deep red.
“It's a self-destruct mechanism!!!”
Abigail's voice reached me from behind the thunderous roar.
I force the motion into my stiff neck and lookup.
Abigail had grabbed Lydia's arm and was pressing her.
Next to me, Ferris was shouting and putting her hand on my shoulder.
Abigail had done it, hadn't she?
Gradually I got used to the pain, and my thoughts recovered slightly.
“The Butcher is made to self-destruct when he's about to die! The damage accumulated in Gevaudan's body from the earlier fight has exceeded the threshold for the self-destruct mechanism to activate!!!”
That's a lie.
Abigail, who witnessed the end of my fight, used the control device to activate my self-destruct mechanism.
She knew the way to activate the self-destruct mechanism.
Apparently, among all the stuff I had taken and accumulated at the base, there was some of Lasher's stuff mixed in, and there was something similar to a manual in there.
She had already read it and studied it, but it needed a secret spell, almost like a password as a key.
That was not known at the time.
The spell needed to activate the self-destruct mechanism had been given to me by Titania over my ear.
I don't know how she knew it, but she must have used those bugs.
Nevertheless, when it came time to give Abigail the information that would allow her to press my self-destruct button, I was naturally hesitant.
It was completely unacceptable to give her such overwhelming control, even if it was a necessary operation.
But I allowed it to happen.
I think I was under a witch's spell afterall….
When the self-destruct device was activated, it was supposed to cause such intense pain to overpower the Butcher at the same time.
I knew from experience that there was a delay of several minutes, but this was unexpected.
That's why all the butchers who receive the self-destruct command are quietly kneeling on the ground.
A storm of pain and suffering poured directly into my brain.
It's not even an act, I collapsed with both hands on the ground.
“Haven't I told you one of my previous works is analyzing your tools!? so I know how the Butcher works!!”
Lydia was flustered at Abigail, with her stern scowl, both have raspy voices.
Both of them are getting panic ……
although you don't need to speak when you're talking telepathically.
Oh no ……
this is seriously going to make me lose consciousness …….
It's like a balloon is being injected into my brain, and I feel an intense sense of nausea and anxiety coming over me.
I suddenly felt a strange sensation of sorrow.
My tongue had slipped out of my mouth and was licking the mud.
Ferris's crying voice was comforting.
It's your recovery magic that's making my body warm, isn't it?
Ferris, why are you so good with such an ugly monster?……
I will not kill Ferris and Lydia when I am free.
A second-rate professional will sacrifice friends to prioritize the mission, but a first-rate professional will carry out the mission without missing a single friend.
I will keep Abigail, Titania, Ferris, and Lydia alive and kill the others.
Oh, it's that simple.
I can do it.
I'm a trained professional.
I mean, really, if this continues, I might die before I blow myself up…….
I feel awful…….
“Lydia only you can do this! You can pull out that device on the side of his head by using telepathy to reproduce Gevaudan's voice.”
A look of distress flashed across Lydia's face.
Maybe, I think the dangerous act of removing the Butcher's controls is a very serious crime if done improperly.
I think it's as dangerous as removing the safety device of a nuclear weapon.
“Do something, please! If that insect attacked us right now, we'd be dead!? And if Gevaudan dies, I'll be exterminated! I don't want to die and be eaten by another Butcher!!!! Please, Lydia!!!”
It's Abigail's performance, but part of it is mixed with her true feelings, which are sublimated into a true feeling.
The expression on her face was one of terror and anxiety.
――!?ah ah ah Geez…… pain again ……!!
Before I knew it, I had completely slumped over.
Ferris was holding my head and crying.
A warm droplet hit my cheek.
A shadow rushed towards me from beyond my hazy vision, which was gradually narrowing from my surroundings.
『….Gevaudan, I don't care what you say!! but just keep talking! I'll help you, just keep saying something!!』
Something ……….So what is something …….
have never seen my parent's faces since I was born.
I was born in the corner of a dirty brothel.
Soon after, I was abandoned on the side of the road to die of starvation and freezing without ever eating my mother's milk.
but there was a strange person who picked me up.
I can't remember his name.
That person put me in an orphanage.
The orphanage was hell.
An orphanage is just a name, but in reality, it's an atrocious camp for collecting subsidies.
The children there are just nothing more than points to show the government.
How much money does it cost to take care of one child?
With no proper food, my early childhood was focused on one thing: how to scavenge for food.
Growing up was even more miserable.
As soon as I was able to do some work, I was thrown into the battlefield as a disposable foot soldier.
Sometimes they were used as lab rats, poison testers, sometimes as decoys, and sometimes as bait.
It didn't matter if you are a boy or a girl, you were there for comfort at night.
Our lives were cheaper than a single bullet.
I lived through those days.
It's not that I wanted to live.
It was instinct that kept me alive.
If I had a brain that could think freely, I would have committed suicide a long time ago.
So when I finally came to my senses, I took advantage of the chaos of my unit being destroyed on the front lines and ran away.
There was no way that a child who didn't know how to survive could have jumped into the forest unprepared and survived.
But I was picked up at that time.
It was a miracle that I was picked up by someone who happened to be on a mission in the forest and who would later become my mentor and the person who raised me.
There is something that is stuck in the corner of my memory.
I don't know what it is.
When I traced my vanishing memory, a thin veil covered it, and a person emerged.
I can't remember the face of the person I grew up with.
But there is one person.
There is another person who is standing there along with me.
I wonder who it is.
It's someone who has been next to me throughout my brutal childhood.
The ragged child, unsure if she was a boy or a girl, was always staring at me with her beautiful colored eyes shining behind her muddy hair.
Her eyes always looked so delicious to me when I was hungry.
They were like hazelnuts, beautiful and shiny like honey, and they looked so good as she turned her back on me and walked away.
An intense light flashed in my brain.
As the freezing chill in my body subsided, my vision slowly recovered.
A woman's face appeared, peering at me.
『Gevaudan, can you hear me? Answer me if you can hear me.』
『Givaudan, answer me if…….』
Ferris is crying her eyes out.
Next to her, an anxious Lydia is holding a bloody stick that looks like a big five-inch nail.
It was flickering red.
I grabbed a stick and snatched it out of her hand, then jumped up and covered it, hugging it under my stomach.
Immediately afterward, a vibration caused my huge body and the ground to shake.
I slowly stood up.
The shattered and bloody remains were scattered below my body.
There was a tingling sensation of sweat dripping down the side of my head and onto my cheeks.
It tastes like a brain.
Continue to extend out the tongue and lick the side of the head.
There was a hole.
The object that was supposed to be there was gone.
The chains were broken.
An explosion of emotions surged through me, and the blood flowing through my body, seared by the heat, began to burst with a puffing and buzzing sound.
The butcher roars.
The beast's cries shook the earth and raced across the night sky.
The darkness hovering in the sky above me pushed aside the starlight and blessed me for my freedom.
Suddenly, I noticed a voice beneath me.
I looked down from the night sky.
Ferris was bouncing up and down with her hands outstretched above her.
What's wrong with you? Is that a common fox behavior?
『Gevaudan, sit down! Ferris will heal you.
If you don't close that soon, you'll be in trouble.
It was stuck in there really deep.』
I sat down on the floor and immediately felt a warm sensation in my head.
While Ferris was closing the hole in my head, I looked at Abigail.
She was slumped over, looking tired and exhausted.
Our eyes met.
……She has beautiful hazel eyes…….
Does it hurt? Jibodan.』
I licked Ferris's teardrop.
『It's all right.
What's wrong, Lydia?』
I asked Lydia, nonchalantly.
『Earlier, during the battle with the Titans, the self-destruct mechanism in your head nearly went off.
So I took it out of your head.
Are you okay? Is there anything wrong with you? It looked like a very important device…….』
I feel great.』
Because the goddamn chains are off.
It's like the fluffy feeling you get the morning after coming back from a hopeless mission.
『I'm glad you're still here~~~』
Lydia hugged me.
『Thank you, Ferris.
You've been healing me for a long time.』
If it wasn't for Lydia, I wouldn't have been able to do anything…….
I licked Ferris' face again.
I just want to lick and suck her face all night long. In addition, Lydia was also licking.
『If you want to thank…..You should tell that to Abigail.
When I was freaking out about what was going on. Abigail came running and told me what to do right away.
Abigail was also the one who told me to remove that device.
Well, she's even more amazing than I thought! Not every subhuman is a fool, I guess』
Abigail is a helpless woman.
Abigail put her hand on Lydia's shoulder.
『You're all right now, aren't you ……
『Thanks to you, Abigail.』
『So! be nice to Abby when you get home!』
Lydia said with a smile.
I'll be nicer to her than I've ever been.
There's no one who can stop me when I get back.
I'm leaving, taking Abigail and Titania with me.
I want to thank Ferris and Lydia, but I don't think I'll have time for that.
I'll definitely do something to repay them before I destroy Faymbaum.
When it's over, the aliens will be punished for making me look like this, for trampling on my dignity and my soul for so long.
『Let's go home, both of you.
It's not safe here.』
『Yeah, it's not safe if they attack us again.』
Lydia and Ferris nodded their heads in agreement.
Let's go home.
At home, Abigail's collar will be removed.
And that's the end of it.
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